i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
