What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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