It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
