Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I didn't notice because vodka
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
