honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Randomize
