Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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