well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
