K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
