I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
