Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
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