I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
