i may or may not be watching the land before time
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
