dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
