glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
is this the sara with the beer cane?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
