I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
