You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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