If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
