We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize