Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Screwed.edu
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
