True but thats because hes a fetus.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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