I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
