In the future we'll all be gay
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
