You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize