I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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