dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
this boner is exhausting
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Randomize
