Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
