Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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