Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
