she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
