How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Everyone says I win the strip club
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
