I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
