D3 body, D1 cock
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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