You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize