Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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