i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
