ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
