how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize