Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I miss vodka workout Fridays
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
