I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
