Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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