Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I think I died a long time ago.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
