i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'm at about main and main street
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
