Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm bleeding and have questions
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
