how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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