Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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