i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
