Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
