What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
