I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I would fuck him just for his dog
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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