Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
